Two and half months gone already, I can’t believe how fast time goes by. It’s been an amazing journey so far. Some days not as good as others but I can honestly say that I wouldn’t trade anything that’s happened here because I know that each situation is refining me and making me more like Christ.
I came here with the thought that I knew it all and God didn’t have a lot to do in me. Boy was I wrong! In just this short amount of time, God has broken off pride that I didn’t know even existed within me. What a humbling experience…I felt like God was stripping a layer of flesh off of me. Why was I holding onto pride? What satisfaction did it give me? I have received more satisfaction being real and vulnerable with people even if I didn’t get a pleasant response back. It has allowed me to see the places I try to keep under my control instead of letting God be God.
Another interesting thing he is teaching me is about protection. Protection of my heart and guarding my heart. About 99% of the time, I think that I can do a pretty good job protecting myself. I had to learn that lesson the hard way. God is showing me that my idea of walking by faith is having all the risk and discomfort removed and making sure that He has laid the path out clearly before I begin to take any steps. Truth is, that’s not real faith. Real faith is saying God I am weak and dependent upon you, and I love and trust you enough to take steps even when I cannot see the path clearly because you are God and I am not. I am still in the process of learning what it means to let God protect me and guard my heart in relationships with others around me, I guess it’s a much better position to be in than trying to do it on my own. I’ve found that doing it on my own leads to broken hearts and wounds that require God to come patch things up before He can begin to teach me and before I am ready to learn. The broken hearts and wounds have not been in vain, they have brought me closer to the presence of God. For that I cannot say they were worthless.
Every day I am learning what it is to glorify God with every aspect of my life. The purpose of my life and everything I do should be to bring honor and glory to His name. That hasn’t been the case for a long time, I am excited to say that God has revealed that to me and He is showing me how to walk in that. I feel so happy and overflowing with joy knowing that I serve a God who loves me and cares about me enough to take the time to teach me, refine me and make me more like Him. Every day I catch myself doing, saying or acting in a way that doesn’t bring glory to His name and I am blessed that He offers grace and forgiveness. Just when I think I’m getting ahead, I fall three steps behind and there He is stretching out His hand to pick me up and say let’s try again. Never let the possibility of failure paralyze you, let God in that failure and let Him refine you.
Hebrews 10: 22-23 “let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”
Hi kelsey,
You’re doing great!!! It’s a joy to read your updates,
and the kids miss you!
Love, Marielle & Family
What an inspiration you are Kelsey. I see so much growth with you through your written word. That is why He gave you the life verse Jer. 29:11…because greater things are yet to come with you, sweet girl.
We Love You Kelso!
Doug, Angie, Erik & Katie
Hey Kelsey,
You made me cry girl. Your words are a blessing, keep up the great work. I miss you lots. I am so happy your family is coming soon for a visit. What a great time you will all have even though I will miss my helper. We think and talk of you often. Love, Pam
I know God is growing you in ways you never imagined. Isn’t HE so good?! Your dad and I are so proud of you and we can’t wait to see you. Keep shinning for Jesus!!
Love you lots,
mom, dad and Kasey and Steven